looking down…
The Lord appeared to us in the past, saying: “I have loved you with an everlasting love; I have drawn you with unfailing kindness.”
Jeremiah 31:3 (NIV)
Looking forward to after-work time. Whew! Finally got out of work. Glad that I finally have some me time. I was feeling free for a moment, but then, as I thought about the workday, I became depressed: I got called into my supervisor’s office for not meeting our goals, I forgot the meeting at 4 pm, and I remembered all the stuff I had to do when I got home. Then, I thought about the day before and how I messed up again; how I made poor choices (again), and how I struggled to wake up on time (again). When will I ever get it right? When will this self-destructive cycle ever end? Probably never.
I felt my shoulders droop, and my energy go away as my thoughts became increasingly negative. The weight of the world was on my shoulders; at least it felt that way. I was feeling crushed physically, mentally and emotionally. I wanted to escape this feeling. My secrets were killing me. I secretly didn’t believe God could help me or that things would ever change; it was all on me to pull myself out of this hole I was in. I literally almost wrecked my car because I wasn’t looking at the road but at the steering wheel… lost in a tornado of pain. I saw on the floorboard evidence of not meeting the goal I had set for myself to clean up this mess of a car! How hard should it be to clean up a car? I felt the shame and guilt well up in me again. I just wanted to be somewhere else; be someone else. I couldn’t focus on the road and driving, so I pulled into a parking lot to catch my breath.
APPLICATION: Reflect on a time when you felt down and God met you in that space. How did that make you feel? How did things turn out? Take a few moments to thank God for His care of you.
PRAYER: Father, I pray that You will raise me up as I feel down or sad. Fill me with Your everlasting love. Amen.
“… Our Father in heaven…” Matthew 6:9b (NLT)
- What do You want to say to me today as my Father?
“… may Your name be kept holy.” Matthew 6:9c (NLT)
- What do You want to reveal to me about Your power today?
“May Your Kingdom come soon.” Matthew 6:10a (NLT)
- Help me make Your priorities my priorities today.
“Give us today the food we need,” Matthew 6:11 (NLT)
- Is there anything specific You want me to do with my time or the people I’m around today?
“and forgive us our sins, as we have forgiven those who sin against us” Matthew 6:12 (NLT)
- Reveal to me anyone I need to forgive or ask for forgiveness.
“And don’t let us yield to temptation…” Matthew 6:13a (NLT)
- Is there anywhere I’m vulnerable to temptation?